FAQautism

A variety of reasons stand behind the poor conversational skills of some individuals with autism. Some may simply not connect with other people, so they are, in a sense, carrying on a conversation with them selves. Others seem to want to connect with others and strike up a conversation, but simply do not have the social skills necessary to come up with a topic that is of interest to other people.

Listen Now:

 Standard Podcast [5:42m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

When our friends with autism talk incessantly about one topic, we tend to cut conversations short or even avoid talking to them. A more productive approach might be to purposefully carve out time for frequent, short, casual conversations and to systematically teach them to talk about new topics. After all, our goal is not to stop conversation, but to decrease their irritating obsession with one topic. Here are some tips for making that a successful and pleasant experience for all involved.

1. SYSTEMATIC TEACHING. Most of my friends with autism who are verbal really struggle with appropriate social interaction. This issue is particularly evident in their topics of conversation, and by the fact that they tend to focus on one topic – a certain person or event, imaginary or real. Perseveration and obsessive focus on one topic are, of course, inherent in autism, so we cannot expect people with autism to suddenly stop focusing on one topic and automatically blossom into excellent conversationalists. Instead, our friends need our help in gradually shaping their conversational skills. Among other things, this systematic, step-by-step process involves helping expand the topics of conversation beyond one obsessive interest.

2. EXPAND CONVERSATION TOPICS. Take some time to explore people, items, and events of interest to your friend with autism, then help them develop a conversation around two or three new topics at a time. For example, one of my articulate teen students with autism only talked about a sports figure he met once at a Special Olympics event. Because I had known him since he was a toddler, I knew he had a sister away from home in college, and I knew he liked driving his grandpa’s tractor, swimming, and playing his guitar. I made four small laminated “talk cards” with a photo on the front and a few key words on the back. For example, one card had a photo of the young man with his sister on front and these words on the back, “Sarah,” “Rice University,” “Houston,” “pharmacist,” and “dorm.” He carries his talk cards in his pocket, and we make new cards occasionally. I encourage his family, teachers, job coach, and others to ask him to show them the pictures on his talk cards and to strike up a conversation about one of them.

It is important note that I did not make a talk card about his Special Olympics sports hero. That is not to imply that this person is not important in his life. The purpose of the talk cards is not to eliminate his connection with this person, but, rather, to help expand his focus and his conversational topics. Interestingly, this young teen rarely talks about the Special Olympics anymore, and seems genuinely interested in his new topics.

TIP FOR THE DAY. Fussing is rarely effective when our friends with autism irritate us with repetitive habits and irritating behaviors. Rather than saying, “Don’t talk about that movie again,” we can, instead, help our friend develop new interests and expand their topics of conversation.

NOTE TO READERS AND LISTENERS: I am Cathy Knoll, a board certified music therapist and long-time friend of many folks with autism. At FAQautism.com we are committed to providing free, practical, everyday tips for making life better for people with autism. Feel free to send me a confidential email at talk@FAQautism.com with your thoughts or challenging situations or innovative solution. And don’t forget to check out our website for a wealth of ideas and a glimpse into the world of autism. http://FAQautism.com

Automatically generated related posts:

1. Repetitive Conversations No matter how patient we are, repetitive conversations about the...
2. Changing the Subject Some of my friends with autism tend to talk rather...
3. Art of Conversation Participating in the fine art of conversation can be challenging...
4. Range of Conversation Skills When our friends with autism have adequate receptive and expressive...
5. Conversing with Others Sometimes we fall in the trap of thinking in terms...