FAQautism

It is certainly easy to assign blame when looking at a situation from afar. Parents of youngsters with autism sometimes hear comments about their inability to control behavior or about their poor parenting skills. A celebrity recently made headlines for accusing parents of paying psychiatrists for a diagnosis of autism so they can have an excuse for their child’s poor progress in school. Another celebrity said that nearly every person with autism is just a brat who has not been told to straighten up.

Listen Now:

 

 Standard Podcast [4:36m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

Obviously, these folks have not spent much time with people with autism. In reality, autism is a neurological disorder caused by abnormalities in brain structure or function. In some ways, life would be easier if every person with autism were born with bright green ears or a blinking light on their forehead, making their diagnosis certain and rock-solid. But many of our friends with autism look like their typical peers, so their diagnosis is not always readily apparent to outsiders.

The diversity across the spectrum of autism only adds to the confusion. One person diagnosed with autism may be very friendly, but unable to tolerate changes in routine. Another may be unconnected and almost oblivious to other people, but quite tolerant to unexpected changes in routine. An adult with autism may seem just like other adults at their job or in their college class until we learn he is not toilet trained. A teen with autism may seem like a typical student until she has a major meltdown when she hears a fire alarm at school. These inconsistencies can certainly be misconstrued as purposeful, defiant behavior problems rather than issues inherent in autism.

At the same time, a diagnosis of autism is no reason to simply accept the status quo Just as with typical people, most individuals with autism do, indeed, respond well to high expectations. Parents, teachers, therapists, and others can gradually raise the bar and patiently help a person learn new skills and new behavior patterns.

The goal is not perfection, but progress. Parents cannot make the challenges of autism disappear by yelling at a person to straighten up and try harder. But individuals with autism can move forward when provided with patient, systematic guidance in a structured, supportive environment.

Tip for the day: Develop a thick skin in response to criticism, and do what you can to help people move forward.

NOTE TO READERS AND LISTENERS: I am Cathy Knoll, a board certified music therapist and long-time friend of many folks with autism. At FAQautism.com we are committed to providing free, practical, everyday tips for making life better for people with autism. Feel free to send me an confidential email to talk@FAQautism.com with your thoughts or challenging situations or innovative solution. And don’t forget to check out our website for a wealth of ideas and a glimpse into the world of autism. http://FAQautism.com

Automatically generated related posts:

1. Revealing Autism 2 We are continuing the conversation about the pros and cons...
2. Revealing Autism 1 A parent asked recently about the wisdom of telling her...
3. Two Steps Back Progress can be evasive. Just as soon as we see...
4. Report Cards YIKES! Report cards and progress reports are coming home this...
5. Adult Diagnosis Parents wrote asking for thoughts about the wisdom of pursuing...