Downward Spiral
“Sometimes my team and I feel as if we are on a never-ending journey of dealing with one difficult behavior after another,” commented a teacher of junior-high students with autism. Other teachers, parents, and therapists have made similar comments about the on-going nature of behavior management. The undertaking can seem like a downward spiral, but, if we take the long view, it is actually more like a circular building process.
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For many years, I viewed behavior management as a linear process that required us to pick from one of five choices. Either we ENCOURAGED a behavior, or we learned to TOLERATE it, or we realized we needed to IGNORE it, or we developed a plan to SHAPE it, or we took immediate steps to STOP it. As I follow the lives of more and more individuals with significant behavior issues, the concept of those five choices rotating in a circular motion has emerged.
We don’t need to wait until a behavior gradually becomes more and more irritating before we address it. Interestingly, the most effective way to STOP a behavior is to ENCOURAGE a different, incompatible behavior. So, for example, if a person has a problem with touching the hair and faces of everyone he meets, even strangers, we teach him to keep his hands in his pockets while in public.
It is up to us to anticipate inappropriate behaviors and take purposeful steps to teach more appropriate behaviors. Consider the three scenarios below.
1. When a youngster first starts singing the Alphabet Song or quoting the entire script of Star Wars, we tend to think he is exceptionally cute or bright. But when the song or script is repeated incessantly or loudly in public, our patience wears thin and others view our friend as irritating and strange.
2. When a toddler with autism seems content to play with the same three blocks for hours on end, we are relieved that they are able to fill their free time constructively. But, the toddler soon grows into a teen obsessed with playing with the three blocks, and we discover that he displays extremely explosive behavior when we introduce any activity that interrupts his block time.
3. As a youngster with autism grows into an adult, her obsession with giving bear hugs to everyone she meets is not longer sweet and endearing.
We can try ignoring these behaviors or nagging our friends by saying, “Don’t do that,” but neither strategy works well in the situations described above. On the other hand, when we shape and encourage more appropriate behaviors to replace the irritating or obsessive habits , we are shifting the focus and building upward. So, it might be less frustrating to look at this ongoing process as a series of overlapping circles that help individuals move forward rather than as a hopeless downward spiral. We welcome your thoughts and ideas. Just send a message to talk@faqautism.com
Note to FAQautism.com listeners and readers: I am Cathy Knoll, a board certified music therapist and long-time friend of many folks with autism. At FAQautism.com we are committed to providing free, practical, everyday tips for making life better for people with autism. You can click on a button to send me an email with your thoughts or challenging situations or innovative solutions. Check out our website for a wealth of ideas and a glimpse into the world of autism. www.FAQautism.com
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