End of Your Rope
Today’s podcast offers some first aid for caregivers who sometimes feel as if they are at the end of their rope. When everything comes crashing down and no light is visible at the end of the tunnel, what can we do?
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SPECIFIC STRATEGY Today we’ll just talk about one strategy for surviving these hopeless moments. Try this: write down a list of factors you cannot control then quit worrying about them. There is not point in wasting time and energy trying to change things that are out of our control. The fact is that many caregivers cannot control their life circumstances, the diagnosis of autism, medical issues, or the chronic nature of “forever parenting.” We cannot change the fact that we never have enough time, energy, or money to take care of all the daily details that need our attention. We cannot change the fact that some people are jerks – they will ridicule our youngster or tell us that our child’s disability is our fault. Some things simply will not change, so we might as well stop wasting our energy complaining or trying to reverse the irreversible. That doesn’t mean we need to pretend these situations don’t exist, but it does mean learning to accept the circumstances and focus on other aspects of our lives. A poem called Serenity Prayer sums up this strategy: Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the energy and ideas to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference!
NOTE TO LISTENERS AND READERS: I am Cathy Knoll, a board certified music therapist and long-time friend of many folks with autism. At FAQautism.com we are committed to providing free, practical, everyday tips for making life better for people with autism. You can click on a button to send me an email with your thoughts or challenging situations or innovative solutions. Check out our website for a wealth of ideas and a glimpse into the world of autism. www.FAQautism.com
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